Did I mention that I’m a member of a posh-ish gym? (Actually, most gyms worth their salt in Kyiv are posh-ish, aka expensive). Mind The Gap is also a member of the same posh-ish gym, and you can read about some of the not so posh, but verra verra funny, goings on here, here and here.
In recent weeks, it seems as though I have been gallivanting from one place to another, flitting about like a well travelled little munchkin, enjoying life and my jetsetting lifestyle. Kinda true, I guess (it’s hard to enjoy the jetsetting lifestyle when one is afraid of flying!), but as a result, my fitness regime has gone to the dogs.
Now, you’ll remember that, during my three week sojourn in the second-motherland, AKA the UK, Mr Moi and I spent a week in Scotland, walking 152 kilometres (that’s 92 miles) through the untamed Highlands. This was supposed to fill up my fitness quota and go some way towards getting a dent into the 10 kilos or so that I’ve heifered on since I’ve been in Ukraine.
The only problem was, we booked our trip with these guys. See the bit where is says ‘support manager’? What I didn’t realise at the time of booking was that this support manager would end up cooking so much deliciously evil food, that everyone would finish the walk weighing more than when they started. So much for the weight loss dent.
So, having finally returned to Kyiv and eager to get back into the routine of daily life, yesterday I ventured to my first gym class in two months: pilates.
While I never expected the class to be a doddle – I’d done enough pilates over the summer to realise that it’s exhausting – what I didn’t expect was that I’d actually not be physically able to complete over half the class.
And even more embarrassing, my old teacher had left and had been replaced by not only someone who can’t speak English, but a bloke (yeh yeh, I know I should be more confident and empowered… But have you seen some of the arse-in-the-air moves required by pilates? This is bad, considering I almost need air traffic clearance to get my arse off the ground these days. AND there were only two other people in the class, so everyone is kinda in everyone’s face, excuse the sorta-pun).
Thus, during the class, the combination of exhaustion and m(ortification)odesty saw me choosing to sit and stretch, rather than complete many of the more complex moves.
And thus, I can’t understand the following… Why, oh why, I have woken up today with the sorest muscles and the worst headache I’ve ever had? I must be waayy less fit than I thought I was.
Damn it. There’s not antidote to that except… More visits to the gym.