*Scroll down for some photos of what’s going on in Kyiv today*
Have you heard this one?
A man walked into a bar.
He should’ve been more careful.
Chrisb at Ms Cellania is on a mission to make us all laugh. Today she posted an Irish joke that was rather giggle worthy (and she said “most of you will get it before the punchline.” I’m so slow, I didn’t get it until a couple of seconds after the punchline).
Her joke reminded me of one of my all time faves. And I’m not insulting Irish people – I’m half Irish Aussie convict myself (the other half is stubborn Scot).
It’s long but worth it.
* * * * *
Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop. Right away they go over to the bird section. Gerry says to Paddy, “Dat’s dem”. The clerk comes over and asks if he can help them. “Yeah, we’ll take four of dem dere birds in dat cage op dere,” says Gerry, “Put dem in a peeper bag.” The clerk does and the two guys pay for the birds and leave the shop.
They get into Gerry’s van and drive until they are high up in the hills and stop at the top of a cliff with a 500-foot drop. “Dis looks loike a grand place, eh?” says Gerry. “Oh, yeh, dis looks good,” replies Paddy.
They flip a coin and Gerry wins the toss. “I guess I git to go first, eh Paddy?” says Gerry. He then takes two birds out of the bag, places them on his shoulders and jumps off the cliff.
Paddy watches as his mate drops off the edge and goes straight down for a few seconds followed by a ‘SPLAT’. As Paddy looks over the edge of the cliff he shakes his head and says, “Fock dat, dis budgie jumpin’ is too fockin’ dangerous for me.”
A minute later, Seamus arrives. He too has been to the pet shop and he walks up carrying the familiar ‘peeper bag’. He pulls a parrot out of the bag, and then Paddy notices that, in his other hand, Seamus is carrying a gun.
“Hi, Paddy. Watch this,” Seamus says and launches himself over the edge of the cliff. Paddy watches as half way down, Seamus takes the gun and blows the parrot’s head off. Seamus continues to plummet until there is a SPLAT!, as he joins Gerry’s remains at the bottom. Paddy shakes his head and says, “An’ oim never troyin’ dat parrot-shooting nider.”
A few minutes after Seamus splats himself, Sean strolls up. He too has been to the pet shop and he walks up carrying the familiar ‘peeper bag’. Instead of a parrot he pulls a chicken out of the bag, and launches himself of the cliff with the usual result. Once more Paddy shakes his head – “Fock me Sean, first der was Gerry wit his budgie jumping, den Seamus parrot shooting and now you blimmin’ hen gliding.”